Being “different” isn’t always a bad thing!

photo provided by http://www.freedigitalphotos.net

 You would think that after thousands of years evolution accepting one another for who we are should have become a lot easier, the sad fact is that there is still a lot of bigotry, homophobes, narrow minded idiots out there who can not understand that it is our human right to find happiness.

 

Society and Religion has a horrible habit of trying to tell us what is acceptable, moralistic correct and normal.

 

The Media makes a Billion Dollar Industry of trying to tell us what is sexy, “in”, beautiful, desirable etc.

 

We are bombarded constantly by everyone elses thoughts of what is ok and what is to be hidden or corrected.

 

I want you to step away from all of that for a few moments and consider the following truth. We all are looking for the purpose of living, we all are looking for happiness, and we all are looking for a little thing called love.

 

Ironically by trying to be like everyone else or by forcing yourself to be someone you are not you are ruining your chances for happiness and essentially for love as well.

 

Your purpose for living is a very straight forward one and one that glares you into your face from the moment you took a breath on this earth. Your main purpose in life is to LIVE YOUR LIFE TO THE BEST OF YOUR ABILITIES. Oh yes, I know you are saying it can’t be that simple. Who says it is simple? How many times have you been too afraid to do something you really wanted because you were afraid of what others thought about you?

 

Do you know how many marriages are doomed from the beginning because one or the other partner tries to represent them-selves as something they are not. In some cases “Marrying for love just isn’t enough” in order to make a marriage work for the rest of your life. We see that constantly with the high divorce rates.

 

Take someone who is a fetishist, submissive or dominate nature and who has strong needs to be able to live their desires out on a regular basis. If this person hides those things from their future partner out of fear of rejection, they doom themselves from the beginning to a life of misery. We always think that we can just “forget” about those parts of our psyche, but the reality is that they are just as much part of us as our hair, eyes, arms and legs. If we lose it, we would dearly miss them.

 

What about the misplaced girls (a mentally programmed woman born into a masculine body)? Many try for most of their adult hood to live as responsible men, often even husbands and fathers, while every part of them yearns to be a woman. Not for sexual fetish reasons either, but simply because their was a mistake at birth. They by all pratical purposes are women in every aspect but the physical. For someone like that it is extremely difficult to find happiness with someone who can not accept them for who they are. To not be able to speak openly and honestly about the confusion they feel and the needs to be accepted the experience.

 

Bi-sexuality may be viewed as a fad by many, but the stark reality is that it is still no more accepted by either straight or gay/lesbian communities. You should hear some of the very stupid comments you get from time to time.

 

Look even at the hypocrisy of gay versus lesbian that so many face from hetrosexual individuals. Ask almost 75% of so called hetrosexual males today what they think about either and you will hear – Two women with each other is hot, but two men with each other is just disgusting. Really? Why? If the women are lesbians you aren’t going to have a snowball chance in hell to get yourself in between them.

 

Sexual preferences do not define if you are a moral, good and hard working person. They define which gender you may find attractive enough to want to get up close and personal with. That is about it. I don’t even like to use the word preference here really because in many cases it isn’t a choice, but the way someone was born. In other cases it was due to extremely bad experiences with the other gender that they have turned their back on it. In either case, who are we to judge anyone?

 

Wouldn’t it be horrible if we all were exactly the same way? If we all thought the same thoughts, enjoyed the same things, looked the same, behaved the same. Do we really want to see being “different” as something to be frowned down on or should we see it for the wonderful blessing it really is. That what makes us different can just as easily be called makes us unique! Wonderful! Amazing! Worthy of love and acceptance.

 

Look at the body ideal that is pushed on us daily and the realities of life. Not all of us are born with the genetic coding to be thin, have a full head of hair, big busted, well endowed etc. Not all of us can be tall, a specific skin color which is thought of as beautiful at the moment. Instead of worrying so much about what the commercials (which are just designed to sell products which will never turn you into the airbrushed model you see on the Magazine Ad or TV anyways) try to sell to you, wouldn’t it be better to seek the weight, look, etc that would make you feel most comfortable?

 

We all change as we grow older. We all will encounter endless disappointments in life, successes, obstacles, challenges, and the feeling of being accepted or rejected for who we are.

As a very wise person once said: “I’d rather be hated for who I am, than being loved and accepted for who I am not!”

 

This is probably the wisest saying you can ever come across and something I would almost encourage you to write down on your mirror so you have to see it every day. Be yourself, be honest about who you are and those who will still accept you after they see you with all your perceived wards, are the people who you can truly treasure in your life. All the rest don’t matter my friends.

 

Just remember what I said. Sometimes being different isn’t all that bad!

 

XOXO

Shalamar